Forthcoming Book: How to Swing

​

Given the growing interest in and popularity of polyamory, open relationships and other forms of “ethical non-monogamy,” it is surprising to me that there is no authoritative text on swinging—a form of sexual freedom that one participates in with their partner. To me, swinging is the best of all worlds: the emotional singularity and commitment of traditional monogamous relationships with the sexual adventurousness of open ones. Do people know swinging is an option? Even if they did, to what or whom would they turn to learn how to get started? No definitive guide exists.

Even though almost 70% of women and 90% of men report having a threesome fantasy, almost all of them are without a map toward making it happen.

​

How to Swing provides that map. A collaborative project authored by myself and my husband, Misha, the book covers what swinging is and isn’t, the benefits, and how to get started. We walk through conversations for couples to explore together, practices to improve trust and communication, and techniques for better sex. We provide guidance on what to expect in swinger environments, norms and social dynamics in the community, common mistakes “newbies” make, and how to be successful as a couple seeking other couples or singles for “play”—the swinger word for sex. After years of research and experience, we wrote the book we wish existed when we got started, hoping to reach people who know they want to swing, as well as open minded individuals curious about “The Lifestyle.”